Understanding the financial crisis

Heidi is the proprietor of a bar somewhere in Europe. In order to increase sales, she decides to allow her loyal customers - most of whom are unemployed alcoholics - to drink now but pay later. She keeps track of the drinks consumed on a ledger (thereby granting the customers loans).

Word gets around and as a result increasing numbers of customers flood into Heidi's bar.

Taking advantage of her customers' freedom from immediate payment constraints, Heidi increases her prices for wine and beer, the most-consumed beverages. Her sales volume increases massively.

A young and dynamic customer service consultant at the local bank recognizes these customer debts as valuable future assets and increases Heidi's borrowing limit.

He sees no reason for undue concern since he has the debts of the alcoholics as collateral.

At the bank's corporate headquarters, expert bankers transform these customer assets into DRINKBONDS, ALKBONDS and PUKEBONDS. These securities are then traded on markets worldwide. No one really understands what these abbreviations mean and how the securities are guaranteed. Nevertheless, as their prices continuously climb, the securities become top-selling items.

One day, although the prices are still climbing, a risk manager (subsequently of course fired due his negativity) of the bank decides that slowly the time has come to demand payment of the debts incurred by the drinkers at Heidi's bar.

However they cannot pay back the debts.

Heidi cannot fulfill her loan obligations and claims bankruptcy.

DRINKBOND and ALKBOND drop in price by 95 %. PUKEBOND performs better, stabilizing in price after dropping by 80 %.

The suppliers of Heidi's bar, having granted her generous payment due dates and having invested in the securities are faced with a new situation. Her wine supplier claims bankruptcy, her beer supplier is taken over by a competitor.

The bank is saved by the Government following dramatic round-the-clock consultations by leaders from the governing political parties.

The funds required for this purpose are obtained by a tax levied on the non-drinkers.

Now I hope you finally understand our current Financial Crisis!

www.zishanansari.com

Have finally parked a domain. Will be soon coming up with it.

Caricatured

My sweet Dad and Mom, victim of a cartoonist's imagination, painted in purple by me. Whattey fun!!!!

Havelock-ed ....

Yes, I am totally Havelock-ed. The beauty of Havelock Island has captivated me into its never ending abyss. I don't think there is a more beautiful place in India with turquoise blue and clear water beaches. The havelock Island in The Andaman group of Island is just one of them. The day we reached Havelock from Port Blair, was cloudy to some extent, rather cloudy enough to prevent us from exploring the rich marine life it has. The disappointment didn't lasted long, and the entire mood was set for the ultimate fun after I first saw the super cool looking turquoise blue water.

The day we reached, we just throwed ourselves to the still water of Vijayanagar Beach and to accompany us was the one of the coolest mate I have ever met, the one and only Sammy. He is a Labrador, and belongs to the Island Vinnie resort, our stay at the Havelock. The tented cabanas of the resort were comfortable enough to let us sleep, but not more than what is required, so that you don't miss out on exploring the Island. After the rains in the Island one thing which can actually trouble you in the night are the Mosquitoes (be prepared). It is a great feeling in the all alone island in the night and strolling by the beaches is fun.

The other day was planned for snorkelling, and I prayed for it to be sunny. The rich marine life has a lot to offer. We went to the Elephant Beach for it, as the water there is shallow and is best for snorkelling. All the fantasies which I had, which were due to being a fan of Discovery channel and cartoon network, seemed to fulfill when I actually touched the corals and saw numerous different kinds of fishes, even spotted a blue starfish. We snorkelled for about an hour first and then went back for snacks, relaxed and then again were busy doing the same thing for the next two and a half hours. It never seemed to end. Every time we went ahead, it seemed we had a totally different world. We stopped it before we could not swim anymore of fatigue, and returned back to the resort for lunch. The food again is awesome here, the major category of the tourists here are the foreigners, so almost all sorts of food is available. The sea food tastes much different from wat they cook in the other parts of India. Some of the restaurants also serve the 'Catch of the day'. Just look if yours has some.

After lunch, we explored the entire Island on bike, went to the elephant training camp and Radhanagar beach (declared No 1 beach in Asia by TIME in 2004 and was amongst the top 10 beaches in thhe world). What I feel is the best thing to do in Havelock is to go unplanned and go break free. But only in the off seasons my friend !!!

Happy birthday machiiiiiii..!!!!

Live with intention.

Walk to the edge.

Listen hard.

Practice wellness.

Play with abandon.

Laugh.

Choose with no regret.

Continue to learn.

Appreciate your friends.

Do what you love.

Live as if this is all there is.....

Artificial underpinnings

Clicked by me while rushing towards Malad station in an auto rickshaw around 7 in the morning. I was thinking about the tiring day and knew that will have terrible pain in my legs by the time I come back. But when I saw this I got doubly invigorated.

Yes you got it right ..... that is a pegleg.

All girls IIT- Why should boys have all the fun?

Well, the fact is no more hidden that the Indian girls are more powerful than those of yester-years, they have been outdoing the people all over the world, in various fields since quite some time now. A whole new IIT is in work plan of the new government, to add new workshop for manufacturing even more professionally qualified female work force at par with the global standards.

Since the inception of IITs, the admission of the girl students in it was always a concern for the academia across the country. The reason clearly reflected the condition of availability of education and support to the girl education in the country. We have certainly come over the age, when girls were educated only to run the houses in a more efficient manner. The best example is our honorable president Smt. Pratibha Patil.

Smt. Pratibha Patil in a spree to utilise the intial 100 days target of the newly formed government, without wasting any time has asked to take necessarry action to start an 'All girls IIT' and that too in Amravati, showing her roots from her earlier constituency from where she was elected MP. This town of vidarbh feels deprived of the industrial advancements and is really concerned over the sucides committed by the peasants over a past few years. Now, the people of Amravati have something to cheer forever. The hope of the 'All girls IIT' would have certainly raised a wave of excitement amongst the girls dreaming to pursue their degree from an IIT. And guess after whom is the institute being named ?? No brownie points for guessing it though. None other than Smt. Indira Gandhi.

The JEE2009 results are out and girls constitute a fair 10.4% (1048 out of approx. 10,035 seats) which certainly is more than the previous years. The quality of education which this institute will impart alongwith the other newly added IITs and NITs to the ever increasing number of engineering colleges, is still debatable. The question still persists, should the government work only on increasing such institutes of national importance, or should work on the overall betterment of the quality of education being offered across various institutions across India?

The conditions is still pathetic if the quality of teaching in the primary and high schools of various villages is concerned. Under payed teachers, do their not so interesting jobs, of imparting the knowledge which they themselves failed to gain once. This is clearly reflected by the pass percentages from the results of the state board exams. A TV channel recently broadcasted the report, covering up the low pass percentage in the UP state board exams, and to my surprise, the teachers who were being interviewed were not aware of who 'Mahesh Bhupati' was, and said blatantly that Lord Shiva is called 'Mahesh Bhupati'. Although 'Mahesh' is another name of Lord Shiva, but dear teacher is this what you are going to answer your students for this question. The journalists covering this news couldn't do much more than bringing this matter to the public.

High hopes with the government this time. Not only the investors, but the tax payers of the country want the government to show tangible results. Afterall we pay taxes for the betterment of the country, and wish to see the basic rights of having good education and healthcare reaching all the citizens. Let Jai ho be the cry for the next five years.

Dharti gol thi.....

(clock wise from top Varun Sharma the Prof. , Mr. D, Mr. Me, Vav Singh, Satty the sattu, Mr. handu apna Mangu ::: Photographer - Megh)

Our college was such a place where I really felt that the Earth is round. Reason for this was the omnipresence of our beloved Mr. D (thats what he calls himself, what others calls him is a bit abusive, rather true). Until second year, it didn't mattered, whoever you are, wherever you may be in the campus, every one had this very fear that Mr. D (and the reason for my not using his real name is that he feels it derogatory) might arrive any moment to blabber, and bore you till death. He was an expert, and later on people started bullying him to get rid of his annoyance. My day in college was never complete without giving a dose of my stupefied 'Gyan' to him, so that he shuts his mouth up.

These days things have changed, and I have started feeling things are growing flatter, and so is the earth, We are getting away, despite the advances in Telecommunication and Internet. The reason being Mr. D is having a job, which fills his mouth with tons of stinking Indian Rupee notes, it keeps his mouth shut, and to add to it, Mr.D has also found his better half, rather his better three-fourth, Miss P. So Miss P keeps him busy, whenever he feels he is free. Its good for the Earth actually, and since Miss P has entered into Mr. D's life, the average intelligence of the Earth measured by the talks of people has increased significantly. Thanks a lot Miss P for doing this, keep on doing it, you are very good at it. These days they are in Delhi, making Merry. Something which we did two years back while interning at CARE (Center for Advanced Research in Electronics) in 'IIT Delhi', yeah I want to stress on the intern part because that was a hell of task for us. The title of our dissertation still scares the hell out of me. The pic below will justify it.

No comments please......

Bhrashtachaar ki oonchi udd rahi Kite hai

Just churning my memory zone a bit too hard to get the lines out of this incident.

He arrived late night. I was asleep then, only came to know in morning that my Maternal Grandpa's brother came to visit us last night. I was 5 years old when this happened. I Was happy to meet him in the morning and left for school. After I came back, i asked Mom I have to deliver something in this independence day function at school. The class teacher (Sarkar teacher) has asked to do so. It is nearing and dad seems so oblivious of it. Who will write a speech for me. My Nanaji's brother who also is to be referred as Nanaji but a bit Vice one, I mean Chhote Nana, said lets do one thing. Why not recite some Hindi poem. I said I have been asked to deliver an English speech. But he said why not a poem. I had no clue, as to who will write. I said a strict no to him, after half an hour he came up with something, to which I just couldn't refuse, it was very easy for me to understand and memorize to be orated that very day. A few lines which I recall today from the poem goes like this

भ्रष्टाचार की ऊंची उड़ रही kite है ,
गरीबो की रोटी से हरदम fight है |
अमीरों के घरों में देखो रात को भी कितनी Light है ,
और गरीबों की बस्ती में आज फिर से Blackout है|
नित नयी इमारतों की बन रही Layout है,
मजदूर के झोपडे अभी भी छत Without है|
मंत्रियों की देखो कितनी रंगीन Day-night है,
और नौकरशाहों की भी कितनी मस्त Life है|
यह सब देख के लगता है,
इस देश का भविष्य कितना Bright है|
इस देश का भविष्य कितना Bright है|

There were a few more lines in it, which I am not able to recall right now, but I feel I can add a few more lines to it as a tribute to my chhote Nanji, the one amongst many such unsung heroes of our motherland who envisaged this country's future and acted in a way that coming generations have much better of what they had.

नानाजी आपकी बात आज भी कितनी Right है,
कुछ समस्याएं तो अभी भी उतनी ही Tight है|
परन्तु आर्थिक रूप से स्तिथी हमारी काफी Strong है,
और पश्चिमी ताकतें साबित हुई Wrong है|
खेलो में भी हमारा बढ़ रहा Hold है,
भारतीय क्रिकेट से तो दुनिया हुई Bold है|
इन चुनावों के बाद तो देश के Left भी हो गए Right है,
हमें निरंतर प्रयत्न की ज़रुरत slight है, फिर हम गर्व से कह सकेंगे की,
हमारा भविष्य सच में Bright है|
हमारा भविष्य सच में Bright है|

I know many such lines can be added to it. If you feel like adding a few lines, just drop a comment. I will include them with your signature in this poem.

Aaj ki taaza khabar @ NITDGP

It will be one of the longest post in my blog. Plagiarism as you may call, but I own the right to reproduce the content of which I was a part of. A proof of what friendship actually means in Engg college, the life in its most humorous form, and that is non derogatory sarcasm.

Folks this is from one of the postings of one of our Orkut community "Aaj ki taaza khabar @ NITDGP" and it truly gives all sorts of proof that how "vela" we all were in our final year. Those were really best moments in the college. However, very unfortunately later on things became very awful amongst the so very lovely freindship of ours. But things are over now, and everyone is doing well. Please go thorugh the posts and feel nostalgic, yeah thats the intention, to make you feel damn nostalgic, and if you feel like crying for losing all those moments then you can do so in the comments section. This also reveals a few of the dark secrets of our campus, which are still unknown to our parents. So please avoid virals which may reach the parents.

10/26/07 AZHAR

aaj ka khabar 26-10-07

1.aaj chunnu aur uske wing ka peene ka plan hai aab dekhna hoga ki out kaun nahi hota hai kyon ki almost sab hi ho jayenge.

10/26/07 Rohin Chaurasia

welcome to the jungle....

are aaj SIR aur GOYAL DA ghar se jungle ko waapas laut chuke hai....

10/26/07DeCent dEvil..

main dawe ke saath keh sakta hoon ki chunnu out nahi hoga kyunki chunnu "FAULAAD" ka bana hai aur use daru jaisi cheezon ka nasha nahi hota
hehhe

10/26/07 1st Anniversary@

jab dc aa hi gaya hai toh bakchodi toh hogi hi.............dc ko salam...........

10/26/07AZHAR

health concious chunnu aaj se chunnu ganja marna band kar rah hai only darooo

10/26/07 1st Anniversary@

daaru se kya hoga uska.......................

10/26/07 \3 \ K \ R /-\ N

bhai kapil aaj se do din ke baad wing mein khabhi nahi dikhega....so wing walon jaldi jaldi mil lo....

10/26/07 \3 \ K \ R /-\ N

aaj bawala daddu ke pass nahi jayega.....

10/26/07 Sunny Agarwal..

....abhi ki tajaa khabar .........chunnu ko hua hai jukaam ...isiliye aaj maarenge ko rum......

10/26/07alok

@ Bikiran

kripa kar k aap aaj ki taaza khabar par concentrate karein... do din baad ki nahi..... community k naam ki garima ko banayein rakhein.....

10/26/07Sunny Agarwal.. ....... bhaiyon ......chunnu ne abhi abhi decide kia hai ki woh aaj dinner nahi karenge .........par kyun ??? ......ne gusses ?? 10/26/07\3 \ K \ R /-\ N abe navpreet sachin aur pawar da ne maal mara yeah kya taja khabar ho sakti hai......i m litle bit confused....??? 10/26/07Sunny Agarwal.. vishvast sutro se pata chala hai ki.....anshuman ...jo ki kareeban 5:30 baje shaam ko ......hall 9 ke peeche se gandhi more ki pre jaane wale raaste pe dekhe gaye the ......abhi tak laute nahi hain .......... 10/26/07 \3 \ K \ R /-\ N haan bhai sayad unko fungus ki padeshani ne fir se apne majboot sikhanje mein zakar rakha hai 10/26/07alok @bikiran newspaper mein roz loot maar , murder n kidnapping hi hoti hai... par fir bhi woh taaza khabar hai..... maal aaj laaya gay hai... aaj shaam.. taaza taaza..... isliye taaza khabar hai ye..... n pawar saahab joing dis maal party fr d last time as he announced at gandhi more...... so pawar sahab all d best 10/26/07Sunny Agarwal.. kal subah se ravi da ka jhoops khul rha hai ........so more gandhi more aur DI 10/26/07 Sunny Agarwal.. nomore ...gandhi more ... 10/26/07 AZHAR abhi abhi taaza kahabar yeh aayi hai ki angshu-man bawla pande aur ustad ke saath dekhe gaye hai ..gandhi mode mai 10/26/07Sunny Agarwal.. sriman choksey ne aaj kai dinon ke ghor upwas ke baad .........khush hokar ...raat ka khana khane ka nirnay liya hai .........

10/26/07 Sandeep Reddy @

kyun

bikiran bata ki bawala kyun nhi jayega daddu ke pass????

10/26/07hell's angel

taaza khabar

aaj ki khabar mein di gayi khabar k aaj pandey daddu k pass nahin jayega ki pushti nahi ki ja sakti hai................kyonki jab bawla daddu k pass jata hai tab saari duniya so rahi hoti hai....................waise bhi chahe duniya upar se neeche ho jaye...yaa chunnu daaru chod de.........yaa humara college mein padhai hone lage ..................pandey daddu k yahan jaana nahin chodd sakta haiiiiiiiiiii.......................

10/26/07DeCent dEvil..

aur nit canteen me jab chauksey ji khaana khane hi wale the unhe chunnu ki cigg ke dhuen ke karan bhayankar khansi ho gayi...thik waise hi jaise pagal kutte ko hoti hai
isliye aap logon se nivedan hai ki jab chunnu kahin pe ciggi peeta dikhai de to bhoolke bhi paas na jaayein warna ye aapki sehat ke liye hanikarak siddh ho sakta hai..

10/26/07 hell's angel

taaza khabar

aaj ki taaza khabar ka naya update....................

vikas ko kisi anjaan no se call aaya hai ...............
aur humari gupt sootro k anusaar woh kisi neha aka pooja naam ki ladki ke dost ka tha aur us ladki ne kaha hi abhi neha ko call mat karo ABHI kyon ki abhi PHONE PAPA K PASS HAI........baad mein zaroor call karna................yeh soochna bahut hi akhand aadharo per sthith hai is liye kripya isse mazak nahin samjhe...........

tip of the day [\red] :: yeh aam soochna hai ki anil kisi bhi ladki k liye kisi bhi dost ka kaat sakta hai.............kabhie bhi.....................to yaaaro chain se soona hai to jaago..

10/26/07alok

laut aaya CHANDRA...........

aaj canteen mein khana khate samay.. humein saubhagaya se us prani k dharshan hue jink naam se hi chaaron dishayon ka ghor andhera dur ho jata hai.... ji haan.. sahi pehchana aapne.... one n only CHANDRA... ASHISH CHANDRA.... jo ki Lucknow ki dharti ko pawan kark laut aaye hain.......

Chandra ne lko se durgapur ki journey ,jo ki aam taur par 18 ghate ki hoti hai, ko 29 ghanton mein pura kark ek naya kirtimaan haasil kiya hai..... shayad train k driver ko pata tha ki train mein shri shri .. 1008 shri chandra ji maharaj trave;l kar rahe hain......
jai ho chandra dev ki....

10/26/07 Rahul

NAMASTE!!!

abhi abhi so ke utha aur pata chala ki POLO-SUDO-MAN daru peeene gaya hai isliye phir se sone ja rha hoon....
jenhe bhi bachna ho kripa apne apne rooms band karke light off kar le aur jitna bhi khat khataya jaye, darwaza na khole!!!!!

10/26/07vikas

breaking news

powae aur navpreet aur sachin g***a maar rahe hae hai
pawar ke room par.....powar maggi bana raha hai jisk khani hai aa jaye

10/26/07 Rahul

aur haan pawar ka yeh bhi kehna hai ki 4 5 logon ke layak maggi hai!!!!!

nokameikto arikitojiriki...."> 10/26/07 PAwaN SInghi-->

Extra offer !!

Maggi khatam hone par Pawar ki ghar se layi kachoriyan di jayegi !!!!

10/26/07 vikas

VISHESH SUCHNA................

abhi abhi khabar aayi ha ki maal aur daaru party ne gathbandhan kar liya hai aur PRABHU ne apni maggi ki suraksha k liye polo sudo man ko bulaya hai is karan aap ki jaan khatre mein ho sakti hai agar aap wahan jaane ki koshish kare ....................

10/26/07Navpreet

Conditions Apply.....

all those who come for maggi have to join the party and participate in it.... i guess u understood..... Tc bYe....

nokameikto arikitojiriki....">10/26/07 PAwaN SInghi-->

Bikash ko sab community memeber ki taraf se hardik aabhar prakat karta hun !! jinhone humhe poloman ke kahar se bachne ke liye inti mahatawpooran suchna di !!!

10/27/07 Navpreet

plz be genuin...

yeh bikash namak balak man ghadant baatein kar raha hai.... this news is wrong....
warning to all those who dont keep this in mind.... TaKe CaRe

10/27/07 vikas

bikash ki khabar jhoothi aur bebuniyaad hai

nokameikto arikitojiriki...."> 10/27/07 PAwaN SInghi-->

Bikas ki membership par khatra !!

Uper mili gawahi ke tahat bikas ka is community main rahne par ab sawal utna chahiye !!! jhuti khabar fela kar vo logon ko gumrah karna chahte hain !!

10/27/07 d more i know

maggie

jisko maggie khani ho...pawar ke room pe aa jao
jaldi

10/27/07 vikas

mai aa raha hoon

..

10/27/07Sunny Agarwal..

poloman ....5 peg maarne ke pachaaat .......jara sa out ho gaye hain .....abhi woh mishra ke room mein baithkar ......gtalk pe ek laude ko chaat rahe hain ...usse ashleel baatein kar rahe hain......................g unit ke logon se sadar nivendan hai ki woh kripa karke yahan aayein ....aur padam shri sudoman ko yahan se le jaayen

10/27/07 hell's angel

bikaash da playboy

aaj ki taaza khabar ka naya update....................

vikas ko kisi anjaan no se call aaya hai ...............
aur humari gupt sootro k anusaar woh kisi neha aka pooja naam ki ladki ke dost ka tha aur us ladki ne kaha hi abhi neha ko call mat karo ABHI kyon ki abhi PHONE PAPA K PASS HAI........baad mein zaroor call karna................yeh soochna bahut hi akhand aadharo per sthith hai is liye kripya isse mazak nahin samjhe...........

10/27/07.............

aaj subah

aaj main subah 8:51 AM par utha...
uthate hi room se bahar moothne nikala...
aur dekha ki sir aur pawar apne kapadon ko dhoop dikhaane
le jaa rahe the...sir ke loom par awasthy ki aatma poloman and co ki
jammu ki photos dekh raha tha...fir woh mere ko dekhkar hanste hue
bathroom ko ho liya..aur hanste hue hagne chalaa gayaa...

10/27/07 Lokesh Awasthy

Muktansh AKA 'Mutth'aansh AKA Partner AKA ACE AKA GUPTAANG ghar se wapas aa gaye hain..unke paas laddoon aur mithaiyon ka poora zakhira hai!!

10/27/07 vikas

abhu abhi khabar aayi hai kya woh zakhira abhi abhi khatam ho gaya hai .................
aur apne guptang bbhaiya sone ki koshish kar rahe hain ...........is karan koi use disturb karne naa jaaye..........

10/27/07DeCent dEvil..

mujhe abhi apne vishvasniya sutron se pata chala hai ki aaj shayad dopahar 3-4 baje ke aas paas bhukamp aane ki sambhawna hai .
isliye sabhi logon se nivedan hai ki sambhal kar rahein..
agyaat sutron se pata chala hai dhunna namak vishaalkay prani aaj hostel me wapis aa jaega is liye hostel ka cetre of mass and equilibirium shift hone ke poore chances hain jisse ki bhukamp aa sakta hai...
isiliye kripya dopahar ke baad apna dhyan rakhein aur band kamron se bahar nikalein warna aisa bhi ho sakta hai ki kahin aap un band kamron mein hamesha ke liye band ho jayein

over and out.
deepak..
aaj ki taaza khabar

10/27/07 Lokesh Awasthy

abey iss KAL TAK ke DC ko mooh band karo

10/27/07hell's angel

DOGA (kutte) ka aatank

doston sochiye ki aap gehri naand mein so rahe hoon aur sapna dekh rahe ho ki aap shikar per gaye hain...............apne apne shikar k jigar per nishana lagaya aur woh dard se karha ne laga...................per yeh kya sapna toot jane k baad bhi karhne ki aawaz aa rahi hai..............................haan doston yeh koi dokha nahin hai ....................

humare hi hall ke humare hi wing mein ek kutta hai jo chori chipe logon k roomm mein chuppp kar so jata hai ...........................uska aisa karne ke kahi karan ho sakte hain....jaise ki woh kutaa humare beach mein reh kar konfuse ho gaya hai ki woh bhi hum mein se ek hai aur kisi k bhi room per so sakta hai..........ya ho sakta hai ki woh observe kar raha ho ki ek engg aue ek kutte mein kya fark hai...................per sabse alag ek rai yeh hai ki woh kutta LH ka JASOOS ya AGENT hai jo yahan ki khabrein wahan pahunchane ka kam kar raha hai...................

kaaran koi bhi ho per kutte k aatank se koi bhi nahin bacha .....hai raat hote ho sab appne room band kar so jaate hain.............kutte ko kisi room se bhagaye jaane per saare log apna room band kar lete hain taki kutta unke room mein na aa jaye...

is liye doston doston kutta ya kaha jaye ki hall 4 ka aatank yakaha jaye ki DOGA se bachna ho to humesha sawdhan rahe.........

...................................chain se sona hai to jaago..................................

** This is just one of the post, for more hilarious news and age old updates check that very community of ours.